“often unpleasant.” You have written about your child-hood
52
WBM july 2012
as “a very hard one. There were no heroes in your
family, just outlaws and fighters. And pain, anger, sor-row.”
The only home you ever had was foreclosed on. You
were always feeling like you needed to escape. What do
you say to that eighth grade boy trapped in a family situ-ation,
just trying to survive the dysfunction, alcohol or
drugs, or maybe even crime, just trying to escape?
RW: The first thing would be is that, “Son, you are in
charge, you are in control. Every kid has a chance to make
a decision.” I’ll never forget one time I started to leave the
house and mom said, “Have a good time, but do the right
thing.” I said, “Mom, how do I know what the right thing
is,” and she said, “You’ll know.”
I believe every kid has an opportunity to make decisions.
The guidance that the parents give them is extremely impor-tant.
Everybody knows parents who are marvelous — who
follow the line of what every psychologist or every educator in
the world says — but it doesn’t work with that kid. And there
have been situations where there was not much parental influ-ence,
and those kids come out to do very well …
My lifetime when I was a kid was tough. I wasn’t always
happy. I would have sad moments. I would have moments
that I would quote, escape. But I never let the sadness engulf
me. I never let the sadness dominate me. I always tried to
look to the good things.
WBM: To you, what is a Tar Heel?
RW: I think a Tar Heel is a person who very much cares
about being educated, who very much cares about trying to
better him or herself. When you’re a faculty person at the
University of North Carolina you have a tremendous amount
of power because you’re going to influence kids. So to me, a
Tar Heel is someone who gives of themselves; a Tar Heel is
one who does try to help other people; a Tar Heel is one who
cares about the right things and who has feeling and that feel-ing
of that magical little village in Chapel Hill.
WBM: When you didn’t return to UNC in 2000 some
people stopped speaking to you, including Coach Bill
december 2011 at the smith center. Jeffrey A. Camarati/UNC Athletic communications